UPDATE: R.I.P. Frank the Frosting Turkey

Frank the Frosting Turkey

Frank the Frosting Turkey

Sometimes very odd things build on an organization’s team spirit and bonding.  Yesterday in my office it was an unusual November birthday/anniversary cake.  You see each month we get a cake to celebrate all of the birthdays and anniversarys in the office.  The November cake had a reliable Thanksgiving theme.  See photo on left…

Many in the office took delight in the decorating prowess of the baker that does our cakes each month  he or She (betting on she myself) had outdone themselves this time! Photos of the cake were quickly uploaded to Twitter and Facebook, in fact “Turkey Penis Cake” was a trending topic on Google trends yesterday afternoon…uhmm, don’t quote me on that.

Imagine our horror this morning when we arrived to see that our new team building mascot had been obliterated!

Frank the Frosting Turkey is dead

Frank the Frosting Turkey is dead

I see two possibilities here.  1. Someone ATE FRANK!  This is highly unlikely considering Frank was about a pound and a half of pure butter frosting.  I’ve looked through the hallways and in offices and see no one in a diabetic coma therefore Big Joe is off the hook for this crime.  The only other possibility is that someone was offended by Frank’s presence and wiped him from the face of the – errr …cake.  To this person I say, “A pox on you sir killjoy!” (or madam killjoy)

I realize some looked at Frank and saw man-parts.  Frankie was only man-parts  if you CHOSE to see man-parts…  I’m personally offended that some pervert debased what old Ben Franklin thought should be our National Bird!

R.I.P. Frankie-forgive them what they did for they knew not your true being.

We have identified the culprit, however they have entered witness protection and we cannot release their name or information.  However the story has been picked up by the national media.

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About Larry Downes

Son, brother, husband, father, boss, mentor & friend. Believer in unfettered personal liberty. Occasional host on 93.1 WIBC in Indianapolis.

3 Responses to “UPDATE: R.I.P. Frank the Frosting Turkey”

  1. It’s possible that someone really, really liked Frank, and had other plans for him….I’m just saying.

  2. Why Heather! I’m not sure exactly what you mean 🙂

  3. Maybe “someone” was suffering from Turkey Penis envy.

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